I know that N's can be real Nut/Whack Jobs but THIS one beats all! She was renting a condo in my development and she brought in a whole bunch of wild pigeons into the unit; letting them fly EVERYWHERE!!! You can imagine the PILES of bird !@#$ all over the place...including INSIDE A BRAND NEW MICROWAVE OVEN that she left open for them to roost inside of!!!! YUCK!!!!!!
Well, her landlord FINALLY got fed up with all of this crap and told her she had to leave. Now, she is throwing tantrums because the landlord DARED object to her bringing in those danged wild pigeons!!!! She's definitely a few french fries short of a happy meal!!!!!
Lordy. She sounds like one of those animal hoarders. Not necessarily N, but not healthy either. After watching a few episodes of the TV show "Hoarders"... I think a lot of folks like this are holding on to a lot grief - it's a hole that they're trying to fill with stuff, or animals (sometimes food) - and the co-existing depression creates a kind of helplessness where they just don't care, it's overwhelming to deal with, impossible to make headway. Or... in my mom's case... it's become a vehicle for blaming others instead of taking the responsibility herself; there is still a big hole of grief behind it tho' - at least, that's my theory and I'm stickin' to it!
So, you working on talking to the doc and the MRI today? His staff might have some ideas re: transportation for you.
I'm on my last day of prepping for hosting 8 people over a long weekend. You'll appreciate why my anxiety levels go up, perhaps - I feel so clueless about people's expectations and compelled to try to suss out what they might be and plan ahead. Then, there's the fact that I'm opening a hole a mile wide in my normal seclusion/privacy boundaries... that always feels "iffy" for me. I've had workers here off/on the last couple weeks doing some repairs outside - and my old dog & I are just discombobulated when they're here... and only relaxing when they leave. So, I've tried to focus on my own projects to distract myself.
Then, last night hubs says we have to go pick up the boat today... and I was going to do a whole house "top surface" cleaning and pre-cook a few things that will be easy for those times when someone - but not everyone - is hungry for a nosh. This is a restaurant-tasting weekend... so it's not like I have to do meals... but throwing one more thing on my list (when hubs doesn't assist me with any of these tasks - granted, he is doing other things to help!) just throws me into bitchy-negative-self destructive mode. I've already done a lot of outside cleanup - tedious, hard work.
So I scheduled a massage for yesterday! And dropped so far down into a relaxed state, it took me 20 mins to feel like I was back in my body and conscious! LOL. Of course, I was all knotted up and am sore today... but there was a distinct moment when I felt all the chi start to move again - like a dam breaking. I really need to do this more once a year. Then, I was reading in yesterday's WSJ about some studies on massage and it's very real health benefits... the scientists aren't completely sure what goes on in the body yet. But from experience, I can say that my body holds on to tension... muscles cramp up... nerves are sensitive as hell (and yet numb at the same time)...
It's like the effects of tai chi practice - but way more intense, short & direct. And its an opportunity to experience that physical touch - while totally dependent - that I think I have a primal craving for... in a non-relational (low risk; no drama) way.
But I've got to go and get busy!! I've got so much to do today... and I think the workers are here.
Good luck Bones! I hope you get this current challenge tamed, like I know you will.