Author Topic: Storming  (Read 1708 times)

lighter

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Re: Storming
« Reply #30 on: June 02, 2018, 02:47:47 PM »
Thanks for reminding me this is likely just a formality for the Judge.

My attorney and I have gone back and forth over the dates to determine just how big a chance the Defendant has of convincing this Judge her handwriting is shite, she wrote the actual wrong date on the summons (unlikely as I MADE THE DATE) and should the Judge bite, that the Defendant's attorney couldn't do the math to see that the case couldn't possibly be set for the 11th day after any ex parte order of protection is written IN OUR STATE.  The law states the hearing has to happen in a ten day time period.

Lapsing into naval gazing, my attorney and I have asked everyone around us what they SEE when they look at the dates.  Most see a 24, some see a 29.

Attorney says there's a 50/50 chance this Judge will allow another full hearing.  Attorney says matters like these, out of the ordinary, are taken first, and disposed of quickly, though attorney unsure whether another court date will be set, or if the hearing will go forward right then and there.  I'd rather just get it over with, frankly, esp if we get to have the hearing first thing in the morning. 

::shaking head::.

Can anyone think of questions for the D that will help the Judge figure out what happened, and whether or not she needs to have another hearing?

Lighter




Hopalong

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Re: Storming
« Reply #31 on: June 02, 2018, 06:57:25 PM »
Do you have an attorney for this situation, Light?

I don't feel I can help with legal interview ideas but I hope someone who knows how CAN.

Good luck with this, may it stay simple and go smoothly!

Hugs
Hops
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

lighter

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Re: Storming
« Reply #32 on: June 02, 2018, 10:10:20 PM »
Yes, Hops, I have an attorney.  She's working on how to get this thrown out, but will see.

Lighter

lighter

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Re: Storming
« Reply #33 on: June 06, 2018, 09:55:01 AM »
OK.... this Judge is my attorney's mentor.  Opposing counsel is from out of the county, so he has a better chance of using incompetence as reason to have another hearing, but he's also an outsider.  May cancel itself out, .

From where I sit, opposing counsel and contractor are coming to court to whine about their mistake. 

If contractor has ability to be heard, I'm wondering if the Judge will make him testify alone, and give cause as to why she, this Judge, should reverse the Superior Court judge who gave me the Order.

I already testified.  I already got my Order.  Defendant is the only one asking to be heard.  Some of the texts I would have used to prove he pulled the knife and threatened me are on my sister's phone, now in another country.  She showed up on the proper court date with her phone, prepared to testify. 

I feel OK about this, but I go round and round, what if till this is over. 

I wish I could record in the courtroom, but this deputy is hawk eye on the spot.  Can't even have phone out, much less on, or pointed at someone.

Lighter







 

Hopalong

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Re: Storming
« Reply #34 on: June 06, 2018, 02:38:33 PM »
Ahhh, can't even imagine how difficult this scene is for you Lighter.

Only thing I can think of, which you should only heed to whatever degree feels right, is....

Now...with this....

Is it time to accept powerlessness (in a way), let your attorney be your advocate, and let go?

By that I mean only, you've done all you can. Hyper vigilance probably isn't needed for this crazy dude. If you can keep a lid on your fear (I know, easy to say) then your vibe/demeanor will be...

I know justice will be done.

You can convey that without deep involvement in the machinery of it. Maybe this time, you need to not be. You have already done a very clear, very rational job of providing all the info you could. I don't know, but I believe, chances are this is enough.

I hope it is. Maybe, this time, you do not need to be battle-ready. Because your attorney will take care of you.

Maybe it will actually be a good thing, to trust in someone's help.

I do not know but semi-rationally hope, this is right. (And if it proves wrong I promise you humble apologies....)

xxoo
Hops
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

lighter

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Re: Storming
« Reply #35 on: June 06, 2018, 04:35:06 PM »
I hope my attorney handles this motion, and the Judge denies it, frankly. 

Attorney just texted she wants X amount of money to handle motion in the morning, then, should she fail, will ask for a continuance so she can go over all my evidence.

I'm not happy with wasting another day in court, listening to all the nightmares, finding myself shaking... sweating right before I have to get on the stand, bc of screaming, threatening, crazy people.

I'd rather just go, and get it over with, like pulling of a band aid. 

Or going to the dentist.

BTW I didn't have any issues at dentist today, but dentist couldn't tell me that without announcing there were THREE issues, then saying he couldn't speak of them till exam was over.  I wanted to scream at him..... WATCHING ISSUES OR DRILLING ISSUES!?!?!   Instead I stopped him, politely, and asked in a normal voice. 

WTH?  You don't just announce to someone who struggles with teeth cleanings that there are THREE issues without saying they're things we're "watching."  WATCHING  Not drilling, or working up a treatment plan.

I feel the same about the legal stuff. I have just as much anxiety over it, feelings of helplessness are huge, and I'm not going to handle this hanging over my head for another week or two or three.  It's not fair.  I was in court on the proper day, and my attorney will do her best to put the whiney boy's request where it belongs.

::sigh::

OK, Hops.  I'm going to work on doing all I can, then just letting go.

And I've prepared hours and hours and hours of evidence prep for tomorrow. 

HOURS. 

OK...
I have to whine a bit more before i can let it go...
apparently.

I'll have to re remember all the dates AGAIN if this gets pushed back. My memory isn't stellar when I'm not under pressure like this. 

My attorney knew this was coming for a while.  That she doesn't want to prepare to go forward is now my problem, and bGod knows what she'll want to charge for yet another appearance, this time going through with the hearing. She'll have earned her X dollars if she gets this thrown out, I'll say that, and hope for the best.

Lighter

lighter

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Re: Storming
« Reply #36 on: June 07, 2018, 12:27:06 PM »
I'm trying to remain curious during this process in court today.

So far the attorneys are talking about money and settling what's owed to contractor.  If can settle that, and leave protective order in place, this day may be productive and DRAT!

Hope seeps in.  That's how it happens, right there.

So, what we're here for today is that messy 4 on the summons.  Guess who has the only copy where the 4 looks "bad,"....like a nine for sure?

Yup, contractor took a pen and marked his copy....my attorney not sure what this  Judge  would do with it.  My attorney doesn't want to point out all other copies look different.

I feel like I'm being toyed with by a child who never has to suffer consequences fir his actions. 

Lighter

lighter

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Re: Storming
« Reply #37 on: June 07, 2018, 12:47:28 PM »
 Deal struck.  Now, if I can get a handwritten order signed by all parties NOW maybe won't have to do this again when Contractor spins and changes mind while attorneys bicker over language in an Order he won't end up signing.

lighter

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Re: Storming
« Reply #38 on: June 07, 2018, 05:12:05 PM »
We settled everything in less than 2 hours, wrote out a handwritten contract, and had everyone sign it before lunch, which the Judge held up for us.

I'm happy with the outcome.  I paid contractor what I was offering to pay him the day I fired him.... exactly what he said he was owed that day.  He was asking for double today, and that's strange, bc this wasn't supposed to be about a fee dispute. 

My attorney said that it appeared a fee dispute was all opposing counsel prepared for... OC hadn't done any homeworkl on the Motion before the court today. 

My attorney thinks that, and the fact this attorney has never tried a case EVER, helped get the deal done,  which she was pushing for so it was behind me. 

I'm so grateful.
 

Lighter

Hopalong

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Re: Storming
« Reply #39 on: June 07, 2018, 05:27:04 PM »
So Protective/Restraining Order is in place, you'll pay your bill, and he's out of your hair for good.

HOOO -AHHH!

Now it's time to relax and worry about things like yard work.

Much better for the psyche.

Hugs
Hops
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

sKePTiKal

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Re: Storming
« Reply #40 on: June 07, 2018, 06:46:42 PM »
Bet you find your "zen mode" weeding the moss again Lighter.  ;)
Success is never final, failure is never fatal.

lighter

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Re: Storming
« Reply #41 on: June 07, 2018, 07:42:03 PM »
Yup yup yup.... back to moss, and figuring out class schedule for myself.

I paid my attorney happily.... she charged me less than an Atlanta attorney would have charged me for an half hour.  Amazing, and she did lots of research last night, and was brilliant today.  Just brilliant.

Lighter


Twoapenny

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Re: Storming
« Reply #42 on: June 08, 2018, 08:30:46 AM »
Lighter, I had missed all of this as we had no internet while we were away, my heart was in my mouth reading those posts but I am so glad it all got settled and quickly.  When you say his copy had the dodgy looking 4 do you mean it looked like he changed it himself??  To deliberately cause another problem?  I am so glad this guy is gone and all legal stuff sorted; I'm guessing there's no comeback now as everyone's had their chance to go to court and say what they need to?  I'm glad it's all over for you.  What a bizarre and frightening experience to have been through.  I wish they would set up an island to put all the crazy makers so they can drive each other nuts and leave the rest of us alone xx

lighter

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Re: Storming
« Reply #43 on: June 08, 2018, 10:30:23 AM »
Yes, Tupp.  A messy 4,  on all the copies AND original absolutely looked like a definitive 9 on the contractor's paperwork.  That's not to say that his copy wasn't worse... it was the only faxed copy.  All the other copies were made on a copy machine... this one was faxed to another County.  My feeling is that he had a terrible copy, took a pen, marked it into a worse copy, then copied it again. 

::nodding::. 

Yes.  He did this to add time, trouble, and expense.  Confusion is his cologne.

If I didn't say yesterday, my attorney was gobsmacked when opposing counsel explained the knife incident needed to be placed into context..... OC told my attorney that only happened bc I was refusing to give the contractor the empathy he was asking for, and so menacing me with a knife was understandable.  :shock:

My attorney was mortified.... she's gay, in her late 30's, and did not see that as a reasonable action.  Neither did she believe this Judge would. 

So,  that means that this attorney is one of the "wolf pack" buddies this contractor drinks with nightly.  They belong to their own He Man Women Haters Group, justifying each others terrible situations and behaviors, and reassuring themselves that it's ALL THE WOMAN'S FAULT... nothing to do with them.  Interesting to see it seep into the courthouse.  They have zero shame.  They don't believe women have equal rights.  They see interpersonal terrorism as normal courtship behavior.  It's not pathological.... they kind'a know it's wrong, but they, in their hearts, believe that's the way the world should work, and they're clinging on for dear life.  Sad, really.

Tupp.... here's the thing about PD's causing problems in the legal system.   Usually the system is full of PD's and people who are easily manipulated, or people who make money off of conflict.... think type A attorneys, many N's, IME.

Once the PD does something, someone else, or more than one, can ramp up the problem, and add months, sometimes years to the process. 

IN THIS COUNTY the Judges and attorneys know each other.  There's an easy feeling... very friendly, and I will way they seem to have the litigants under control... they call a case, it gets heard right then and there, or settled outside the courtroom in little conference rooms with glass panels into the courtroom.  Attorneys control their clients,  keeping the topic to JUST THE FACTS AT HAND, and getting to solutions without wasting any time at all.  In fact, I never spoke to opposing counsel or saw contractor's face.  That means litigants aren't triggered by words, or voices, or facial expressions... just brilliant strategy for attorney's who want to settle a case, and move on.  I've never seen anything like it.  Ever. 

I think it's all about intention.... this system isn't run by jaded, corrupt, bitter old misogynists.  Nope nope nope.  The male attorneys are as nice as the female attorneys, no one is competitive.  They all want to protect and serve the families in this civil family court.... I was amazed.  They should bottle the formula, hire only these kinds of attorneys, and implement it in all States, and Counties, IMO.   Honestly, it didn't even feel like court to me, it was so different from my experiences in Atlanta family court.

I wish the crazy people could enjoy epiphanies.... find their humanity and be healed, but that's not going to happen.

About this being over... I kind'a think it's over but for contractor telling everyone he knows that I cheated. stole, and lied....telling them what he did to me, and that the bitch was asking for it.  I have to remember there's no use trying to explain to people who will not hear.

I have to be more careful about who I let into any part of my life.  That's my part in this.

Lighter



 









Twoapenny

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Re: Storming
« Reply #44 on: June 09, 2018, 12:29:51 AM »
Lighter, my skin is crawling.  Malevolent is the word that keeps coming in to my mind when I read about this guy.  And the whole trivialising the knife thing - wow.  That normalisation of abuse or violence is what keeps the cycle going, in my opinion.  Thank goodness for people like you who stand up to men like that, both the contractor and the attorney that thinks this should be seen in context (!).  You've handled this magnificently.  As for being careful about who you let in to your life - it's very difficult, particularly in a work situation.  This guy was recommended to you as someone who would get the job done - not to be a friend or to have any personal ties.  I don't see how you could have been aware that he'd be the way he is.  You wouldn't have had your guard up because he was just there to work and get paid.  He was recommended and that would usually be a good thing.

The contractor will most probably paint himself the victim, it's what they do.  Smart people will see through him, others won't.  I think it's a tough aspect of this, knowing you're being bad mouthed by someone who should be grateful they're not in jail, quite frankly.  You did a grand job, as always.  Know that and focus on your own amazing self :) xx