Author Topic: My husband has cancer that has spread  (Read 97 times)

Bettyanne

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My husband has cancer that has spread
« on: January 20, 2018, 11:51:44 PM »
Hi Friends....Sorry I have not been on here......my husband was diagnosed with prostate cancer that has spread to him stomach, bladder and pelvic bones.  So we were able to find an Oncologist who is wonderful man Dr. Ben Chue.  He is treating Bill and is the kindest doctor I have ever met.  You can call him day or night and actually speak with him.  Bill has two more weeks of chemo to go and then starts a hormone therapy for 3 to 12 months.  He has given us a lot of hope. 
If anyone would says a few prayers we would be most appreciative of that....I know we are not alone and hope all here are doing well as possible.  Life sure changes when something likes this happens.
I will just add here when I was 20 and my dad was dying of melanoma cancer and my NM dumped his capsules for pain and filled them with sugar because she didn't want him to be addicted to pain medicine and yet he would be dying with in a few short months.....what a lesson for me to have kindness and do what ever makes my husband feel better. Thank you Mom for that life lesson.....you sure taught me well :x
Love....Bettyanne

Hopalong

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Re: My husband has cancer that has spread
« Reply #1 on: January 21, 2018, 12:46:40 AM »
I am so very sorry, Bettyanne.

This is an ordeal for him and for you too.

I am just terribly sorry.

Hope you will be able to take care of yourself well despite all this sorrow.

Gently,
Hops
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

Twoapenny

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Re: My husband has cancer that has spread
« Reply #2 on: January 21, 2018, 03:06:17 AM »
Bettyanne, you will both be in my thoughts.  I'm glad you have a good doctor - having someone caring and compassionate on board helps a lot, I think.  I'm staggered that your mum dumped your dad's meds!  Completely shocked.  You are right to do whatever makes your hubby (and you!) feel better.  Just acknowledging someone is unwell helps a lot, in my experience, and I think people accepting you are managing your situation however is right for you is useful.  We all do things in different ways and coping with sudden and unexpected news is no different.  Please post when you get the chance to so we know how you are all doing xx

sKePTiKal

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Re: My husband has cancer that has spread
« Reply #3 on: January 21, 2018, 09:19:16 AM »
Oh, I'm so sorry to hear this! But it does sound like hubby is getting the best care possible. People DO beat cancer, so I'll hope he's one of that number of survivors.

Yes, your lives have changed rapidly and radically. BTDT. But good on you for stepping up to the challenge! It's pretty exhausting to care for someone - the emotional rollercoaster is only the half of it. But it sounds like he's still mobile, and with it mentally. How is he doing tolerating the chemo?

It's real important to take care of you, Bettyanne. Getting some "normal life" breaks is just as essential as eating/sleeping well. It could be that soon this will all be past you and he'll join the ranks of survivors. If, on the other hand, you're in for a long haul, well... don't be afraid to ask for help! He's depending on you - so that's why you must take care of yourself.

There is simply way too much cancer going around.
Success is never final, failure is never fatal.

lighter

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Re: My husband has cancer that has spread
« Reply #4 on: January 21, 2018, 07:24:39 PM »
I'm sorry to read that, Bettyanne.  I'll be praying for you and your husband.

Lighter

JustKathy

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Re: My husband has cancer that has spread
« Reply #5 on: January 23, 2018, 01:41:57 PM »
I'm so sorry to hear this, Bettyanne. It sounds like your husband has a wonderful doctor. Having a physician who is truly caring and compassionate is just so comforting when faced with such a frightening ordeal. My husband also had prostate cancer, and after several rounds of treatment has beaten it. The radiation left him with a disability, but the cancer is GONE. I'll be thinking of you and hoping your husband gets through this as well. Please do keep us posted.

And I must add that your NM was downright despicable to dump your father's pain meds like that. What monsters these women are! So sorry ... ugh.

Kathy

Bettyanne

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Re: My husband has cancer that has spread
« Reply #6 on: February 15, 2018, 07:25:53 PM »
Hi all you dear friends.....here who replied to me.....it means a lot to me......

Bill just completed twelve weeks of chemo......pretty tough on him...losing lots of weight, his hair and going through times of just complete exhaustion.
He will now go onto 3 to 12 months of hormone therapy.  It stops the production testosterone  which the caner feeds off of.  In three months another CT scan ...will tell us how the cancer is or is not doing. 
The beautiful part of all of this has been meeting other people with cancer who have such a good outlook,  good or bad in how the cancer is doing and their outlook.  A young mom with two small kids.....and only six months to live because of brain cancer.  Another mom age 46 with 3 kids and always a smile on her face.....we also realized in conversations her mother another NM.....so she calls me I am her sister with another mister.
These beautiful souls.....have made me see others in a different light....I love seeing them....I love being with them.....what a blessing in my life.
So yes this is a hard journey but one I feel their is hope along the way for my husband and these wonderful people.
Dr. Ben Chue.....research Oncologist Seattle, WA you are a wonderful doctor and one who has so much compassion for your patients.
Thank you friends...for you kind replies.... it means so much to me.......Love, Bettyanne

sKePTiKal

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Re: My husband has cancer that has spread
« Reply #7 on: February 15, 2018, 08:25:37 PM »
Hugs hon. This is a long rough road you're on. I hope hubby starts to put some weight back on and get his strength back.

You are taking care of you too, aren't you?
Success is never final, failure is never fatal.

Twoapenny

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Re: My husband has cancer that has spread
« Reply #8 on: February 17, 2018, 02:18:34 AM »
I like the sister with another mister :)  I hope your hubby is as comfy as he can be, BettyAnne, it's such an aggressive treatment and I know when a friend of mine had cancer she said how weird it was to feel perfectly healthy but then to be made really unwell in order to get better!  It's a back to front situation for the mind to bend itself around.  I hope you're both in the best place you can be at the mo with regards to looking after yourselves.  Keep us posted on how you're both doing and lots of hugs to you both xx xx