My thoughts are with you. I so know the feeling of looking and hoping for help to come. I hope you find the strength and courage to carry forward but I am also glad that you will rest as well. I think I'll share so more thoughts a bit later on.
Thanks, GS. Just realised a typo in my post, the bit about my dad should have read that I was about 8, not sure how I managed to get a smiley face in there instead!
Nearly time for bed, and I've got through my first weekend of trying to focus on me and not fret about everyone else. I haven't called anyone or been out anywhere, we've stayed home and I've been cleaning out cupboards and getting organised for next week. Have rejigged my money a bit and freed up enough to get a gardener in to sort my overgrown jungle out and to pay a babysitter so I can go to a meditation class next week. A couple of people texted wanting to come round but they fall into the 'don't do anything to help and only call when they want something' camp that I am trying to break away from now so I told them both we were busy. Odd how it feels wrong of me not to be available but I want to stick to this and make some changes now.